What not to do on your date that you end up burning your wallet and your chances…
There are many do’s and don’ts when it comes to the dating even in today’s modern world. Yes the guy would normally pay for dinner. But should the guy pay for everything in the entire date? It honestly depends. There are things that are perfectly fine with some people but would be a major outrage for others. Here we try to help with some tips and advice on dating and money, without necessarily having to burn your wallet.
1. Money is No Guarantee
You may think that the guy should pay for everything on a date. But having the guy paying for everything is no guarantee that your date will go well nor will it automatically result in your 2nd date. While statistics are pretty hard to come by, the results from a Malaysian newspaper survey show that wealth (or the lack of) plays very little effect on whether you are ‘dateable’. Girls who have experience dating will never have their perception of their date be solely shaped by how much he spends on the date. Girls appreciate it when guys insist on getting the bill, or buy her flowers of gifts. But it’s the thought that goes behind it, not how much it costs.
- Guys: do pick up the tab for dining but allow her to pay for other things if she offers.
- Girls: do offer to pay for part of the evening and don’t purposely choose the most expensive thing on the menu.
2. Dating Profile Fails
The rules to dating are slowly changing with the rise of popular dating apps like Tinder, OKCupid, and Match.com. The goal of these apps is to sell you the opportunity to find love at the tip of your fingers. How you depict yourself online is important as it is your 1st contact with many potential partners.
Here are a few examples of exactly how you should not describe yourself…
… No. Just so much no.
Tips: Take the time and effort to get a great photo, and write a brief, creative and witty profile.
3. Love Me or My MasterCard?
Everyone tends to put their best foot (or best face) forward when it comes to dating. Especially since you want the other person to like you. And also you may only have a limited amount of time in your date. If you have the financial means and want to splurge a little to make a good impression, that’s great to set yourself apart.
However, you shouldn’t rely solely on your money to win her (or his) heart. Otherwise she (or he) will end up not falling for you but for your credit card. The lines will blur after a while as you may have a hard time differentiating what she actually likes about you as her expectations of dinner dates, presents and gifts all increase rapidly. Unless you are planning to be a sugar daddy (or sugar mama) but that’s a whole other article.
4. Breaking Gender Stereotypes
Although undoubtedly it feels nice when someone offers to get the bill, a girl can end up feeling really helpless when it becomes the norm for the guy to pay for everything. We live in a modern era where women are independent, strong and financially stable. When societal rules like ‘the guy always has to pay for dates’ become customary, it’s a step back for women. This is even more important when you’re dating to look for your prospective life partner as you will be managing your personal finances together in the future.
5. Don’t Fake It
Undoubtedly, when a guy (or girl) carries himself well, dresses well, and is financially stable; it’s attractive. Nonetheless, if you don’t have the monetary means to splurge, don’t! There are many people who go out of their way to
pretend show that they’re rich. Everything looks great from the outside but they are actually heavily in debt and are one paycheck away from losing everything. If a guy wants to show that he can take care of a girl, he has to at least be able to take care of himself first.
6. Don’t Be a Show-off
Showing off how much money you have on a date is not cool. Here’s a true story of a girl who went on a date with a show-off.
I once went on a date with this actor I met on Tinder. He picked out a fancy restaurant, we made small talk and he coolly told me stories about his profession. As he was talking, (which he did a lot of) I noticed that in every story he explained he was always trying to underline it with how much money it cost, or about all the expensive things he owned. Throughout the date I found out how much he got offered at a job, how much he’s earning now, how many properties he owns, where and what time his European holiday will take place, and how much he has donated to charity. By the end of dinner, I was completely disinterested to him on all levels. I just wanted to leave and never see him again.
The moral of the story is, don’t brag about money on a date. It comes off as needy, desperate, and might hint that you are compensating for something else not as big as your bank account 😉
7. Love Ain’t Pricey
Dating does not have to be expensive. There are many things which are free, affordable and/or value for money that you can do together. Take time for find out what each other loves and plan for activities that he/she likes. Invest some time (instead of spending money) to shop for and cook a meal. Let him/her know your friends better by hosting a board game night. Build something together or volunteer together for a cause you’re both passionate about.
(Also don’t forget to give yourselves some alone time and self-loving with some online shopping every once in a while).
Here’s a toast to your dating happiness and ending up with the one you love who loves you back.
This article was originally published on the online shopping blog by ezbuy Malaysia and edited by the MyPF editorial team.